The Philosophy of Friendship.
How To Cultivate and Maintain Genuine Friendship
No matter how rare true love is, true friendship is rarer. That is because friendship isn’t found, it is cultivated, and not many men know how to do exactly that.
You will agree with me that no matter how self-sufficient a man claims to be, he will always need a band of brothers, friends he can share idea with. Men that will challenge him and hold him accountable. Every man need that.
There are many men who lack not a friend, but a friendship. This cannot happen when souls are drawn together by identical inclinations into an alliance of honourable desires.
We will never become the men we are meant to be unless we intentionally cultivate deep and meaningful relationships with other men.
It is natural for our friendship to be largely about the things we do; like sport friends, work friends, college friends etc. Yet a meaningful friendship has to be built on something more – on heart and purpose and matters of destiny.
If you want friends who bond with you at heart, with whom you could genuinely share life, you have to stop settling for friendships that are about little more than a few hours of fun and distraction.
You should have fun with your friends, certainly, but having fun shouldn’t be the sole purpose of your friendship.
Ponder for a long time whether you shall admit a man into your friendship. When friendship is settled, you must trust, but before friendship is formed you must pass judgment. Judging a man after making him your friend instead of making him your friend after you have judge him is like putting the cart before the horse. If you consider any man a friend whom you do not trust, you are mightily mistaken and you do not sufficiently understand what true friendship means. You should be comfortable to discuss anything with your friend. But before you do so, discuss in your mind the man himself.
Friendship is like a garden, you must nurture the flower and get rid of the weeds. You are the average of the people you spend the most time with. Beware of the people you admit into your friendship.
These types must be avoided:
The energy vampire
After spending time with this person, you always feel drained. The conversation usually revolves around their problems and complaint.
The drama queen
People who revel in drama need an audience who will pay them constant undivided attention.
Remember, the more the drama the less the manhood.
The one who disrespects your core values
Friends don’t need to agree with one another’s values and beliefs all the time. But what is critical in any good friendship is respect for each other’s core value and beliefs.
The user
This type of friend is called a fair weather friend. The user seems to be there for you, make plans with you and even invites you places - that is only if it serves a purpose to them.
They are always on the lookout for a way to improve their social status. Once you served that purpose, they are gone.
He who begins to be your friends because it pays will also cease to be your friend because it pays.
The leech
This type of friend always needs you and expects you to drop everything whenever they reach out you. To them, they should be centre of all your actions and attention. It is important to be a supportive friend, with this type of people you have to set clear boundaries.
The gossip
The gossip is the one spreading rumour and engaging in gossips. This friend is dangerous because if they are talking about others, be rest assured they are talking about you too.
Have a legit band of brothers that will raise you up. Associate with those who will make a better man of you.
Welcome those whom you yourself can improve. This particular process is mutual; for men learn as they teach.
As a man, you were born to have power, status, respect, recognition.
And you can achieve all of that today!
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